The fitness industry loves to pretend it’s all about “helping people.” But if you’ve spent any time online, you know that’s not the full story. There are coaches, PhDs, and self-proclaimed experts who spend more time trying to discredit, devalue, and control narratives than they do actually coaching athletes. And if you dare bring nuance, lived experience, or a flipped perspective to the table? They foam at the mouth.
I’ve been in those comment sections. I’ve had their little brigades show up. I’ve seen the receipts.
“Calories in, calories out. Period.”
“PMIDs or it didn’t happen.”
“Core engagement during running? Not possible.”
“Fasted training doesn’t make women lose lean mass.”
“It’s always a choice. You just need to sacrifice more.”
They say these things with authority, with the finality of a gavel slam. It’s not science—it’s control. And I refuse to let that control shut me up.
The Problem With “Truth Tellers”
There’s this new breed of internet coach who calls themselves “anti-grift,” who claims to be the savior of athletes lost in misinformation. They love to drop PubMed IDs in their captions like confetti. They brag about dogpiling people in comments: “It was funny when I spammed her with studies that didn’t count.” They screenshot and mock women who share their struggles. They call lived experience “stupid” and say you look “dumb” for bringing it up.
That’s not education. That’s straight up bullying.
The irony? The very people shouting “misinformation” the loudest are the ones spreading it. They reduce menopause to a calorie equation. They laugh off form work as a waste of time. They mock anyone who dares to suggest fueling before a workout. And then they position themselves as noble protectors of the “truth.”
Lived Experience Is Not an Anecdote
One of the quickest ways they try to discredit women is by reducing our experiences to “just anecdotes.” As if thousands of athletes saying the same thing—fatigue, disrupted recovery, shifting body composition—means nothing because it wasn’t measured in a lab.
But here’s the reality: science starts with observation. Smoking was once “just anecdotal.” Climate change was once “just anecdotal.” Hell, most of medicine began with someone noticing patterns and asking questions. To dismiss women’s lived experiences in peri/menopause as irrelevant isn’t just lazy, it’s anti-scientific.
The Double Standard
You know what’s funny? Some of these same coaches bend over backwards to address pregnancy. They’ll hire prenatal specialists. They’ll create content about how important it is to train safely during pregnancy. They’ll acknowledge the hormonal shifts and the need for careful coaching.
And they should. Pregnancy deserves respect and thoughtful programming.
But when it comes to menopause? Suddenly it’s “stick to the basics.” Suddenly it’s “don’t make excuses.” Suddenly hormones don’t matter. The same body that got specialized care in one life stage is reduced to calories in, calories out in another. That’s what bias looks like in action.
The Attack on Running Form
Another hot-button trigger? Form. Mention Chi Running and watch the hate pour in.
“I was agreeing with you till you mentioned Chi Running, which like POSE is biomechanically not possible.”
“Landing midfoot is not better.”
“You can’t engage your core during running.”
Really? Tell that to the thousands of runners who’ve used Chi principles to resolve shin splints, IT band issues, calf overload, and knee pain. Tell that to the studies showing lower vertical loading rates and improved cadence when form-focused training is applied.
But no—better to dismiss it as “woo” because it doesn’t fit their framework. Better to say it’s “not possible” while thousands of athletes are out there doing it daily.
Fasted Training and Disordered Patterns
I’ve also watched them trip over themselves to defend fasted training. Not with curiosity, not with nuance, but with venom for anyone who questions it.
“Women have hunted and gathered for millennia without breakfast.”
“Your body isn’t eating amino acids when you train fasted.”
Imagine perpetuating disordered eating just to prove you’re "right". Imagine mocking an expert for encouraging women to fuel their workouts, when the alternative has left so many under-recovered, under-fueled, and burned out. They are not protecting athletes, they're attempting to protect their pride.
The Basics Are the Floor, Not the Ceiling
The fallback line is always the same: the basics.
“We’ve been coaching menopausal women successfully with the basics for years.”
“All you need is more sleep, more protein, more lifting.”
No one is arguing against the basics. They matter. They’re the foundation. But when an athlete is doing the basics and still struggling, telling them to “just do more” isn’t coaching. It’s negligence. The basics are the floor, not the ceiling.
The Emotional Intelligence Gap
Underneath it all is a glaring lack of emotional intelligence. They don’t know how to listen. They don’t know how to hold space for nuance. They don’t know how to lead without dominating. They dunk, they dogpile, they belittle—and then they wonder why women don’t trust them.
You can cite all the PubMed IDs you want, but if you don’t have empathy, you’re not a coach. You’re a lecturer. And athletes don’t hire lecturers—they hire people who will help them navigate the messy middle of their training and their lives.
Why I Won’t Step Off the Stage
I know I ruffle feathers. I know my takes are spicier than some people can handle. I know it triggers the self-appointed truth-tellers when I point out that they’re spreading just as much misinformation as the people they claim to fight.
But here’s what my athletes need to know: I’m not here to make the Karens and Chads of the world comfortable. I’m here to serve you.
So when I refuse to be pushed off the stage, when I clap back, when I insist on nuance, it’s not about me needing to be right. It’s about protecting the space for athletes who’ve been dismissed, discredited, and told to just “try harder.” It’s about showing you that your lived experience matters. It’s about making sure you see through the noise.
Because coaching isn’t about controlling the narrative. It’s about helping you thrive. And I will not step aside just because someone else’s ego needs the microphone.